Our "Own' To-do List

‘We need to do a better job of putting ourselves higher on our own "to-do"list.'Michelle Obama

Have you ever had that ‘put-down feeling, that feeling that you really don’t count? I am writing this on Mother’s Day and I suspect that most mothers out there know exactly what I’m talking about. After all that’s what being a parent is all about, putting the needs and wants of others ahead of our own. And of course there’s nothing wrong with that.

When it becomes a challenge is when we continue to put the needs of other ahead of our own, to the extent that we find ourselves embarrassed, or even ashamed, not to. The biblical juncture that ‘the first shall be last and the last first’ [Matthew 20.16] can too easily be understood as meaning that it is somehow wrong to not denigrate one’s own needs. It becomes difficult to actually admit what one wants/needs for fulfillment.

I remember being offered a position of responsibility, in a area where I had some expertise and in which I was extremely interested. My immediate response was, ‘Someone else could do it better than I could.’ The answer to which was, ‘If you want to do it, just say ‘Yes’. I did and was never sorry. But it made me realize how I had fallen into that trap.

Again, the opposite is even more beguiling. You really don’t want to do something. You are busy, and what’s more it really isn’t your area of interest or expertise.But somehow you find yourself saying ‘Yes’ because the other person is busy too or has family problems or just is tired and you feel that it is up to you to solve their problem. Again you feel obligated to solve someone else’s problem first because that is what you ‘should’ do.

Don’t get me wrong! I’m not say that you should never do anything help another person, nor am I saying that you should continually expect to be placed in the limelight. Both of these scenarios are equally bad.

Rather I would encourage you to at the very least make a mental list of the things that we all need ‘to-do’ for ourselves, anything from getting a good night’s rest, to making sure we have sufficient exercise, to taking time to read the novel you have sitting no the coffee table, to having lunch with friends. And saying yes, to accepting promptly and graciously only those things you are really interested in trying.

After all if we really take to heart what Paul says in 1 Corinthians3:16 ‘Do you not know that you are God’s temple and that God’s Spirit dwells in you?’, then surely we need to honour that indwelling Spirit by doing those things that enhance it. Thereby allowing it to grow and become all that it can be.

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