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The Gift of Years



“There is a built-in danger in old age which, if we give in to it, makes aging one of the most difficult periods of life, rather than one of the most satisfying - which it should be. The danger of old age is that we may start acting old.” -Joan D. Chittister





February is my birthday month, and so I received a birthday card in the mail. Nothing strange or odd about that! What does strike me as different though is that I was bothered by that card and its message 'The secret to staying young? Lie about your age.' [In fact it bothered me so much, it almost ended up in the recycling with its envelope.] So I asked myself, ‘Why?’

In retrospect, I have had a good life, with many positives to look back on. But I have no desire to become that person again. And this I think is why this unfortunate choice for a birthday card had such a negative effect on me. Our culture today seems to revere the young. Yes, they do have more energy, more vim, vigour, and vitality than I will ever have again, but what they don’t have is the lived experience, that knowledge and that sense of the unfolding of life.

“The evening of a well-spent life bring its lamps with it” Joubert [French moralist]

I have found the last 10 years of my life to be amazing. My knowledge has increased exponentially. I have learned and implemented new skills. I have a much clearer picture of just who I am, of what my foibles and strengths are. I have made new friends and taken up new activities.  I am no longer who I was at 19, 29, or even 59. I am so blessed to have been able to be on that journey, and to have you all on it with me.

One of my favourite books that I go back to again and again, is “The Gift of Years: growing old gracefully” by Joan Chittister [written in 2008 when she was70 years old]. I have given many copies away, some to friends on one of those ‘special’, milestone-marking birthdays in the hope that they will read it and find the reassurance and wisdom in it that I have. The secret of life is to let every segment of it produce its own yield at its own pace. Every period has something new to teach us. The harvest of youth is achievement; the harvest of middle-age is perspective; the harvest of age is wisdom; the harvest of life is serenity.” -Joan D. Chittister 

And so my birthday wish to you is that you find that joy in growing into the person you are meant to be!


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