“For when two or three are gathered in
my name, I am there among them” Matthew 18:20 (NRSV)
This
has to be one of the best known quotations from the Bible in today’s society,
even among those who don’t profess any religious affiliation. Within the walls of the institutional church,
I have heard it evoked many times to excuse the lack of attendance at study
groups, quiet days, evensong, mid-week services, etc. It is used almost like a
mantra to assure ‘us’ that things are still OK. A mantra, by the way, I don’t
think we really believe.
In
the story from Luke “The Road to Emmaus”, the writer has this line:
“Then their eyes were opened, and they
recognized him…” Luke 24:31[a]
The’
they’ in this story were two people. No apologizes for the lack of numbers. In the last minutes of a sermon I heard recently this comment was made, “It was done in community, a
community of three”. Funny
how these little comments, not the main points of a sermon, are often the ones
that stay with me, and move me somewhere new. And it happened again!
I have heard a lot over
the years about the importance of community, especially of the importance of
the church community. It usually goes something like this [and you can probably
related to at least one of these illustration] ~
‘I
don’t attend church because of the priest/pastor/minister but because of the
community.’
‘I
go to church because of the community.’
‘The
community is more important than the theology of the priest/minister/pastor or
the service.’
‘It
doesn’t matter that you don’t find the community to be a nurturing place. The
community is more important than the individual.’
‘Everybody is so nice at church.’
'People who are part of a church community live longer, are happier, are healthier, etc.'
'People who are part of a church community live longer, are happier, are healthier, etc.'
‘We [those ‘in charge’] don’t want to
upset the community’
In
other words, the expectation of people is that ‘real’ community is only found
in the large group, and that anything else is not ‘real’ community. Yet we have
the example of the success of small groups where close relationships develop and
persona growth is encouraged.
“'Small
groups, where all the members participate as directly as possible, are more
effective for changing attitudes and behaviors then is the lecture method. This
has been shown by “a whole series of studies', according to Paul Hore in the Handbook of Small Group Studies. One
lady told how she took her granddaughter to church for the first time. As they
knelt in the tall-sided pew, the little girl whispered, “Who are we hiding
from?” It is harder to hide from ourselves or from one another in the smaller
group, than in the crowd. John Stott wrote in One People: Clergy and Laity in God’s Church: 'I do not think it is
an exaggeration to say that small groups … are indispensable for our growth
into spiritual maturity.'” [Exploring Christianity, Copyright © Dick Tripp 1999]
Every
large community is made up of smaller communities of varying sizes. But a community
whether it be 2, 10, 23 or 100 is necessary for our spiritual growth and maturity.
So please don’t ever tell anyone that they have to ‘fit into’ a community, or
feel that because the community works for you, it should work for them. Instead,
we need to encourage people to find their community; the community that challenges
them, excites them and validates who they are. And even more
importantly we have to remember the story of ‘The Road to Emmaus’, remember that
in that story it was a community of two that was responsible for eyes being
opened to recognition of the sacred in the ordinary.
I
find community in many places: some of which are over coffee or lunch with a friend, or in a small
group of 10 and a larger group of 50+. Where do you find community?
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