"And a cloud appeared"

‘… suddenly, a bright cloud overshadowed them … [they] were overcome by fear…' [Matthew 17:5, 6]

These words from the first century writer of the gospel of Matthew are as true as I write them today, as they were those many years ago.

We may well share with the writer of and listeners to Matthew, the experience of being up on the mountain and having a cloud suddenly come down, blotting out the sunshine that had been there just minutes before. I know it happened to our family on the Colombian ice fields and when in Cape Town we had to seize the moment when a ‘tablecloth’ was not covering Table Mountain to go up and enjoy the view from the top.

On February 27th, however, people driving on Highway 400, experienced a different kind of cloud . . .an intense snow squall producing near whiteout conditions that resulted in a 96 car pileup [according to the Ontario Provincial Police spokesman]. I am sure, just like the disciples in the passage above, the drivers of any of the vehicles were also overcome by fear.

This experience of being overshadowed by a cloud, of either liquid or frozen water particle is a common one, as is the fear that accompanies it. We become afraid because we cannot see where we are or what might be threatening us. We have no control over what might happen other than to stay perfectly still and trust we can survive.

How does this feeling compare to the feeling we get when we are within the ‘cloud of unknowing’ that is brought on by the lack of certitude in our doubts and questions? Have you ever awakened at 3 am, the darkest part of the night, with a feeling of fear ‘that all is not well in your world’, when God is no longer a reality for you? I have! Have you ever wandered in the mistiness of this cloud, unable to find a way out? I have! Have you ever yearned for the stability of definite answers? I have! Just like the drivers of the cars in that whiteout, I have been afraid.

Miraculously, only three people, with non-life threatening injuries, were taken to hospital from that 96-car pileup. Just as miraculously, I have been rescued many times from my fears by my trust in the underlying reality of what Paul Tillich calls "the ground of all being".

‘Trust' and ‘Fear not' are, for me, two sides of the same coin.

I wrote this piece a couple of weeks ago, when the snow cloud appeared just days before the Transfiguration was being celebrated by the churches using the Common Lectionary. This juxtaposition of the actual event and the readings for that Sunday, prompted me to write the above reflection.

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