"Adrift"

"One does not discover new lands without consenting to lose sight of the shore for a very long time." - Andre Gide

Do you ever feel 'adrift'? I know I do. And when I'm feeling adrift, I also feel lost, alone, and longing for the security of things known. This quote by Gide helped me to realize that what I am feeling at those times is not something peculiar to me, but rather is also experienced by others. I asked a few people I trusted if they also felt this way sometimes. And of course they answered in the affirmative!

And so I started thinking about my life, and specifically about those times when I have felt 'adrift'. One time that comes readily to my memory, is bringing home our firstborn. I am an only child and so had never had any experience with caring for an infant. I certainly felt lost and alone especially when my husband (who was equally inexperienced!) was away at work. By reaching out to friends, family, and of course, in the 1960s, to Dr Spock, I managed to stay afloat until when our daughter arrived three years later, I was no longer 'adrift'.

Another more recent time that comes to mind is just over a year ago, when I retired for the third time ... this time from my job of being a church secretary for 10 years. My life was without form or meaning, and again I had no idea where those things were to be found. Writing this blog is one of the things that I decided to do to give some shape to my week. The idea was not mine, but rather was a suggestion from a friend. Now 21 months later, I feel no longer 'adrift' in how my week is structured thanks once again to the support I have received from others over those months.

I'm sure we all have had similar times in our lives and if we are lucky have found others who are able to help us through those times until they become only a memory. These 'new lands' are the easy ones to conquer.

However, when one loses sight of the shore because the 'new lands' they are looking for are in the realms of theology or spirituality, then one can really be 'adrift' for a long time. And it is scary! There are no guideposts to follow, no friends to lead the way, no manual to turn to. It is not an adventure for the fainthearted. In a way, it makes me think of Sir Francis Drake going off to sail around the world while all the time not really being sure that the earth wasn't flat and he would fall off the edge! Fortunately I am not alone out there. There are many others who are also looking for those 'new shores' who are willing to share their wonderings, their thoughts, and their experiences with me. As we each look for our own 'truth' we support the other in their search. I'm not sure I will ever reach the 'new land' but perhaps it is in the journey that the importance lies.

What has caused you to feel 'adrift' lately?

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